Subject To Change

“Everything changes, nothing remains without change.” Buddha

Archive for the ‘Music’ Category

.Nobody’s Fault But My Own

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Nobody’s Fault But My Own by Beck (lyrics)

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April 26, 2009 at 2:22 am

.”We All Have These Moments”

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“We all have these moments”, I’ve been thinking about those words for a while since I read a comment on my previous post. Normally I’d reply “no, we don’t” in an attempt to seperate myself from everyone else, but, I can’t be bothered doing that anymore. Sure, we all have these moments, but does it help?

Does the fact that other people too experience the same thing as you provide any real comfort? It doesn’t for me. It somehow devalues it, makes it seem unworthy of any effort to get out of feeling that way. Suddenly, my “struggle”, seems childish and… insignificant. I could use more-fitting words, but my mind’s not in the right state right now to be looking for them.

Maybe we do. Yeah, you’re right, we all probably do. This post is pointless, but I had to get that out. Just a thought, but yeah. Anyways.

There’s a strange comfort that comes out of dreaming your own death. I use the word “dream” intentionally, because I don’t mean a nightmare. When fear, anxiety and regret fill up my body and mind, I often imagine jumping off the second/third floor/roof. And the thought calms me down. Does that make me suicidal? I don’t know. I don’t care. All I know is I’m calm, and I’m glad. Just hope it lasts.

I also imagined that before I jumped I would write a long blog post, and it would end with this song:

Cold Contagious by Bush (lyrics)

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March 31, 2009 at 12:37 am

.Noise

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is all I am

In the midst of all the waves and vibrations
Within the center yet without location
Little specks of black and white unwanted

Ridiculous resonance unlike sparkling water
Unearthy tones hummed by the finger
Round and round the crystal glass

Care to filter?
– Normalize demeanor
Graphically equalize
– Posture and figure?

Caught against the meshwork
A residue I become
Trained to be strained
Back to square one


All I am is noise

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March 8, 2009 at 5:07 am

.Silence Is Deafening

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Thought I’d post a song to break the silence.

This is my cover of Damien Rice’s Prague, a hidden track off his album “O”.
It’s nothing compared to the original, which you can listen to here.
But it’s all I have to share for now.

Click to download Prague covered by yours truly

Enjoy. Or at least try.

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January 11, 2009 at 4:01 am

Posted in Music, Subject To Change

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.Misery Is A Butterfly

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These thoughts conjured whilst I was listening to Blonde Redhead’s album Misery Is A Butterfly. Coincidentally, this blogs favicon is an outstretched hand holding a butterfly. I scrolled through my contact list on MSN and found this in a friends personal message: “What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly.” I love the feeling coincidence ushers; the feeling that everything is connected. And it is.

Misery is a butterfly. It has wings. It can fly away. And yet it stays, sucking the sweet pollen you graciously offer. Once it has had its fill and filled you with need, it leaves for another. And the same goes for the other. Until we are all empty vessels looking for our feed. But we were never empty at first. Misery creates loss.

“Remember when we found misery
We watched her, watched her spread her wings
And slowly fly around our room
And she asked for your gentle mind”

Misery Is A Butterfly by Blonde Redhead

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December 12, 2008 at 10:01 pm

.You Know Who I am

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I’ve been here before.
You’ve seen me.
You’ve heard me.
You know me.
Though just one side of me.
What you see now,
Is a coin flipped upside down.
So while you’re still here,
Try and figure it out.
Meanwhile,
Have a listen to this:

Down to Earth by yours truly (no, that’s not the name of the artist. I mean the owner of this blog.)

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November 15, 2008 at 8:00 pm